The Infinite Race
Draft 1Hair up, bib on, neat knots tied on each lace
The prep is done, now confidence is key Perfect balance of aggression and grace, Pushing the flesh to its highest degree. Wrapped in the shining sun’s sizzling embrace Or drowning in the winter wind’s deep sea, No challenge’s too great to delay this race No twists can make a quitter out of me. Ups, downs, and cut-offs will surely appear Changes in terrain or going off-track, There’s beauty in starting the race in fear Then conquering every thought of going back. For the finish wouldn’t be if there were no start For the race can’t be run without a growth in heart. Draft 2Hair up,
bib on neat knots tied on each lace The prep is done. Now confidence is key Perfect balance of aggression and grace, Pushing the flesh to its highest degree. Wrapped in the shining sun’s sizzling embrace Or drowning in the winter wind’s deep sea, No challenge’s too great to delay this race No twists can make a quitter out of me. Ups, downs, and cut-offs will surely appear Changes in terrain or going off-track, There’s beauty in starting the race in fear Then conquering every thought of going back. For the finish wouldn’t be if there were no start For the race can’t be run without a growth in heart. Draft 3Hair up in a pony tail
Wrapped snug at the crown of My head. Bib on, Runner 8765 reporting For duty. Neat knots tied on each lace The prep is done. Now confidence is key The perfect balance of Aggression and grace, Collide together on a track Unending. Pushing the flesh to its highest degree. Wrapped in the shining sun’s sizzling embrace Or drowning in the winter wind’s deep sea, No challenge’s too great to delay this race No twists can make a quitter out of me. Ups, downs, and cut-offs will surely appear Changes in terrain and weather Or going off-track, There’s beauty in starting the race in fear Then conquering every thought of going back. For the finish wouldn’t be If there were no start For the race can’t be run Without a growth in heart. Draft 4Hair up in a pony tail
Wrapped snug at the crown of My head. Bib on, Runner 8765 reporting For duty. Neat knots tied on each lace The prep is done. Now confidence is key With head held high to the clouds The perfect balance of Aggression and grace, Collide together on a track Unending. Pushing the flesh to its highest degree. Whether wrapped in the shining sun’s sizzling embrace Or drowning in the winter wind’s deep sea, No challenge’s too great to delay this race No twists or hurdles, can make a quitter out of me. Ups, downs, and cut-offs will surely appear Changes in terrain, Or going off-track, There’s beauty in starting the race in fear Then conquering every thought of going back. For the finish wouldn’t be If there were no start For the race can’t be run Without a growth in heart |
ERNThis poem here, The Infinite Race, was the first sonnet I ever wrote for this class and just in general. It is written in Shakespearean sonnet with Iambic pentameter. I love sonnets, but writing them could get really stressful sometimes, so I was stressed out when writing this first draft. Running is another topic that is near and dear to the heart, and I always look for an opportunity where I can write about it. This poem is very much like 13.1, except when writing this poem, I had a more generic theme in mind. I wanted all runners to relate to this poem, not just the ones who have run half marathons, or the kids who’ve never even done a 5K. While I considered combining the two poems, I decided not to because I want each of them to portray a different message. I thought the best way to portray this material would be in a sonnet. While a sonnet is working for this poem in particular, I wanted to try out different forms and see how the rhythm and pace change.
For this revision, I changed the format of the poem to see what other sound I could get from it. I wanted to try to get a more rapid sound. The other day, as I was running, I noticed a pattern in my breathing, which was basically an “in-in-ooouuuttt”. I wanted to see if I could imitate this breathing pattern in the poem. I found that I was able to condense some of the longer lines and get them right under each other, so maybe some of the lines sound like the breathing pattern. But I don’t know if all readers would have picked up on what I was trying to do. Although breathing patterns are common to runners, they are not all the same. In this third draft, I took out the sonnet form as well, and began adding lines to the poem in the second draft. I like where it has the potential to go, to be a long poem with shorter lines, and I think it could definitely work with the addition of some more lines. I found with adding more lines, I got the opportunity to play around with enjambment, such as in lines 6 and 7 “The perfect balance of / Aggression and grace”. I also separated the poem into four stanzas. The stanzas are different lines long, and consist of lines with different line lengths. I was wondering if the readers would get distracted by this? I think that the poem is straight forward enough that the reader would not worry too much about why the line lengths and stanzas are different. But just in case, in further revision, I am going to attempt to make the stanzas all the same length. In making the stanzas the same length in draft four, I found that it just makes the poem more visually appealing. Relating form to content is something that was entirely new to me coming into this class. Looking at the poem again, I think this form makes more sense for a poem about running because it is linear. It almost looks like a path that the runner could be running on. |